NLP: The Meta Model

The Meta Model is a pragmatic communications model used to specify information in a speaker's language. It is often contrasted with the intentionally ambiguous Milton Erickson inspired-Milton model. The meta model was originally presented in The Structure of Magic I: A Book About Language and Therapy in 1975 by Richard Bandler and linguist John Grinder, the co-founders of neuro-linguistic programming

It is used for gaining specificity, gathering info, assisting people in enrichening their reality maps, and it's the structure of nitpicking! It cuts through the bullshit, and is particularly helpful in therapy, discussions, arguments and seeing through salesmen, politicians, media BS and attempts for manipulation in general.

1) Mindread
You don't like me - how do you know I don't like you?

2) Lost performative
It's bad to be inconsistent - who says, how do you know?
it's a good thing to - according to whom?

3) Cause & effect
You make me sad - how does what i'm doing specifically cause you to choose to feel sad?
he makes me angry - how does what he's doing make you choose to feel angry?

4) Complex Equivalent
challenge it, how does one thing mean the other, give a counter example

she doesn't like me, she's always yelling at me - how does she yelling at you mean that she doesn't like you? Have you ever yelled at someone you liked?
Have you ever not yelled at someone and hated somebody?

You have no respect for my time cause you're late - how does being late have anything to do with respect, have you ever been late and respected somebody, have you ever been on time and disrespected somebody?

5) Presuppositions
If he knew how much I suffered he wouldn't do that - how do you choose to suffer, how do you know he doesn't know, how do you know he wouldn't do that if he knew?

6) Universal Quantifier
generalizations which are mostly untrue

She never listens to me - never? once? (exaggerate) What would happen if she did?
Nobody likes me - nobody? not one person?

7) Mobile operator of Necessity
I have to take care, I should go to school

What would happen if you didn't? - Expands their model of the world

8) Model operator of Possibility
Can, can't will, won't, may, may not, possible, impossible

I can't tell him the truth - what would happen if you did? What prevents you?

9) Nominalisation
Take the noun and turn it into to a verb

There's no communication here - who's not communicating what to whom? How would you like to communicate?
My relationship is terrible - what's terrible about the way you're relating?

10) Unspecified verb
He rejected me - retrieve the missing info - how/who specifically?

11) Simple Deletion
I'm uncomfortable - about who or what are you uncomfortable?
He never listens to me - who/never?

12) Lack of Referential Index
They don't listen to me - who specifically doesn't

13) Comparative Deletion
better, best, good, worst, more, less, most, least
She's a better person - better than whom, she's the best, compared to who
Your offer is expensive - expensive compared to what

14) Pacing current experience
if they try to link a yes-set, break it into chunks

15) Double Bind
If given two or three choices, create your own

Would you like me to stop by on monday or tuesday - wednesday :)

16) Conversational Postulate
answer instead of acting

Can you close the door - yes I can, would you like me to?

17) Extended quote
the other day I met... who said - what does one thing have to do with the other?