So I'm meditating in all kinds of ways, doing hatha yoga, ritual magick, etc for months now. My crown chakra is becoming more active everyday to the point I feel it swirl near-constantly. I take one day off from mysticism and occultism and smoke some great Holland weed with a friend. Afterwards I'm in bed ready to go to sleep, and I suddenly feel really weird like I'm finally about to switch to another channel consciousness wise which I've been aiming for, for weeks. But what do I do? Resist with every fibre in my body, because I just wanted to sleep. Wanted to kick myself so hard the next day. I've made a deal with myself to jump into the abyss the next time no matter what the circumstance.